Friday, December 17, 2010

Relationship Rescue - Self Help May Save Your Relationship

A young woman and man embracing while outdoors.Image via WikipediaMany people are uncomfortable with airing their 'dirty laundry' in public. They just don't want to sit down with a therapist and hash out their troubles. They do, however, want help for those troubles and for those people relationship self help is as close as the internet.

There are many fine books and other resources online that will help the two of you find your way back to the love you once felt for each other. You don't have to go to a therapist if that idea makes you uncomfortable, you can do it yourself.

If you are unsure where to start, simply do a search for forums that are centered around relationships. Here you will likely be able to get recommendations on some great self help resources, as well as some excellent advice from others in the forum.

Frankly, a lot of relationship problems start because only one person is trying. It's not uncommon to have relationships where one person simply doesn't care and the other person is the one who does all the heavy lifting.

This manner of  interaction can only last so long. After a while, the one doing all the work becomes fed up and stops trying. From that point on it becomes a mud slide.

Take a minute, be honest and take a long hard look at your relationship. If you find that this describes your relationship, you must know that it won't be impossible but it will be a lot harder to turn things around.

You and your partner need to carefully look at the problems in your relationship. Try to figure out what the problems are, and be honest, and sit down to find alternative ways of acting or treating each other.

Please keep in mind that a turn around won't happen overnight. If you or your partner is expecting a quick fix you will be disappointed. If you expect this process to be quick and easy and it takes longer than you expected, it's possible that you will give up because you think it's simply not going to work out.

Instead, maintain realistic expectations and be willing to stick with it until you see some progress. If both of you are really trying, things will get better it's just a matter of time.

The basic recipe is to find what is causing the problems between you and your partner. Discuse the possibilities on how to correct those problems. In most cases this will mean changing some of your habits and renewing your attitude. This takes time so patience is required.

It sounds easy, but it will take enormous commitment from both of you to make it work. The good news is that if you are both committed you can do it and it's pretty easy to find all the relationship self help you will need. A light hearted approach is helpful. Can you both dance?

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?" The mother replied, "Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life."
The child thought about this for a moment then said, "So why is the groom wearing black?"



Enhanced by Zemanta

Monday, December 13, 2010

Relationship Rescue - Can You Both Dance?

ballroom dance entertain gentle icon symbolImage via WikipediaWhile it's never too late to turn a relationship around, the longer you wait the harder it will be to change course in direction of where your relationship is heading. Try to nip problems in the bud before they become deep-rooted patterns of behavior, which will become much harder to deal with down the road.

It is nearly impossible to fix trouble in a relationship if you are the only one trying. Look at your relationship as if it where a dance. They face each other, standing close and gaze into each other's eyes. Their left hands touch, he puts his right arm around her waist and she puts her right hand on his shoulder. He leads in step and she follows, keeping in step and moving across the dance floor in harmony as if you both were one. It takes two to tango and of course, this can only be done if both partners are on the same page, dancing the same dance.

The ballroom is the world around you, the dance floor is the everyday tasks and challenges you both face. Ask your partner to dance, embrace each other, glide through the tasks and step over the challenges. Doing this together as if it where a dance may give each of you a new and positve perspective. Is it possible that matters are not as bad as they once seemed?

Attitude is everything, a good attitude produces positive results. The dance metaphor denotes a joyful or light hearted attitude, which is what people have when they dance.

So, if you feel up to it and I hope you do. Ask your partner if he/she will forgive and forget. Clear the slate and make ready the dance floor. You and your partner could actually go a step further and take ballroom dance lessons, have fun!
Enhanced by Zemanta